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Should I Go Back to the Old Normal or Find the New Normal?

The time after the holidays are a time for getting back to normal. The holidays are behind us, the children are back in school, and we are getting back to work. For many people, “normal” is not a welcome state of being as it means being stressed about money, or unhappy at a job. For others, “normal” means being in an unhappy marriage that they feel trapped in with no way out.

The holiday season can be a very stressful time, especially if you have that uncle who you disagree with on everything from football to politics. It is also a time where people put pressure on themselves to take the opportunity to save their marriage. They want to go out of their way to have fun and try to remember what it was like on that first holiday together and remember why they got married in the first place.

Unfortunately, all that did was put extra pressure on you and your spouse, and now that January has rolled around, and things are getting back to “normal,” you realize that nothing has changed. To make matters worse, everywhere you go, the stores are getting ready for the next big holiday: Valentine’s Day.

Admitting the Truth

One of the hardest things people can do is admit the truth to themselves. Even if it is a truth that you can’t bring yourself to admit. Can you afford to get divorced? What will this mean in terms of child support? Where will we live? Will I be able to maintain my lifestyle or will I have to give up my part-time job and go back to work full-time?

These are all very relevant questions when it comes to making a major change in your life. There are endless other questions you will have to ask yourself, as well as others around you. You might have questions about finances or the logistics of taking care of the kids, the dog, and the house.

All these things are details that will be worked once you take it upon yourself to acknowledge that this “normal” is not the state in which you were meant to live. You want to feel good and vibrant and you are not going to settle for an unhappy life because it is what is expected, or it is the path of least resistance.

Am I Ready to Divorce My Souse?

You must act. Several months ago, we posted a blog about what can happen if you decide to stay together for the sake of the children. This is a very common excuse people give themselves for not acting. As we had discussed, your children are your children whether they are five years old or 35 years old, and thinking your divorce will be easier on them when they are older is something that is just not the case.

You gave yourself the holidays as a last chance. You might have had a great December, but now the cold reality of January has settled in with the mid-February greeting-card-holiday coming up to remind you that your old “normal” is just not good enough anymore. Your new “normal” is out there. You are allowed to be happy.

If you are ready to get started on your divorce, then your first step is to give us a call today at (516) 252-0223 to schedule a consultation with Anthony LoPresti. We are here to provide you with the information you need so you can make an informed decision.

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